Catholic Family Movie Night: Cinderella (2015)

Growing up, my sisters and I (who have a podcast now!) used to play this game where we would call out, “I’m her!” when watching movies about princesses or pretty girls. There were five of us sisters growing up and we each claimed our own princess. Cinderella was always my favorite. She was always kind, hardworking, gracious and appreciative. She was beautiful inside and out, which were major goals for any good little girl.

Flash forward to present day and Cinderella is still my favorite princess for pretty much the same reason, except after studying Catholic femininity a bit, my love for her has deepened even more.

This month’s Catholic Family Movie Night features Cinderella (2015), a live action reenactment of the classic Disney movie. Ella, the main character, beautifully illustrates the feminine genius at its best, a model for femininity not tied to looks or make up, but kindness, integrity, courage and love.

Some Background: Parents Read Before Watching this Catholic Family Movie Night

A Daughter First

Trigger warning: for some kids, it may be hard to watch Ella’s mom get sick and die so be aware of that happening in the first minutes of the movie.

The movie begins highlighting just how loved Ella was by her parents. As her mom becomes more ill, she calls Ella over and gives her some beautiful feminine advice, “Have courage and be kind.” Kindness has power to change the world, which we will see unfold throughout the movie. 

After her mother passes, she runs to her father. She knows he is the most important person in her life and she clings to him. She seeks her father to be happy. This is another foundational principle of the Feminine Genius: We are beloved daughters of God and our purpose is to embrace his love and seek to make Him happy.

We women need to remember that we are loved daughters of God before anything else.

Focused On The Other

Another beautiful example of femininity is Ella’s desire to help others. For example, after hearing her dads dead she said thank you, that must have been very difficult for you. In a time where she has every right to grieve and focus on herself, she looks outward toward the other.

The world tells us that service is demeaning. That when we cook and clean for others, it’s unfair and a lesser call. Jesus shows us something quite different when he, the King of Kings, rolls up his sleeves and washes his disciples feet in John’s Gospel. Ella illustrates throughout the entire movie that service can be beautiful. She models for us, especially us mothers, that there is dignity found in serving others. 

Not only does she seem to serve with a happy heart, she seeks out the lesser and includes them, even the least of the house, the mice. She finds a place for all, includes them and cares for them. Jesus also invites us to do the same when he says in Matthew’s gospel, “‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.”(Matt 25:40.

She also sees the dignity in all living things which is consistent with the feminine genius which is focused on supporting life. In the forest when she meets Kit, not knowing he was the prince, she defends the life of the stag when everyone around her wants to kill it for sport. 

Lastly toward the end of the movie, she was willing to give up everything to protect the kingdom and the prince. The step mother tries to strike a dea with Ella who is trapped in the attic: She would let Ella marry the Prince in exchange for titles and power, but Ella refused. If she had agreed, she could have exposed herself as the mystery princess and gotten what she wanted—but at the cost of allowing the step mother to control and blackmail, which could lead to corruption or instability in the kingdom.By choosing silence and staying hidden in the attic, Ella demonstrates she would rather lose her chance at love and royalty than allow herself to be a tool for selfish gain. That integrity is what makes her truly worthy to be queen.

We women need to remember that service is a call full of dignity and seeking and caring for the other will fill us with joy and fulfillment.

She Receives, not Grasps

There are several examples of how Ella is mistreated. Each of us will encounter such behavior at one time or another. Each of us has a choice when something bad happens to us: We can receive and find the good in it, or we can grasp at something we’d rather have.

For example, Ella is unfairly banished to the attic when the step mother takes over the house after the father dies. Yet Ella looks for the best. She makes happiness possible with what she has, not what she wants. She was hurt and didn’t let her make her bitter. As the narrator put it,“Though she was sad, her spirit was not broken.”

This is not condoning poor treatment of others or even to roll over and let mean people bully us. But Ella emphasizes that her happiness does not depend on others’ actions. She finds a way to find joy and fulfillment, even through the poor treatment. 

She does not let the bad things happening to her permit her to be unkind, either. When speaking with Kit, who is asking about her family, instead of talking crap about them, she simply says, “They treat me as well as they’re able”

This openness, this reception demands a certain vulnerability. She is open to what happens to her, both good and bad. And when it is bad, she hurts because her heart is tender. For example, when her step sisters give her the nickname, “Cinderella,” it visibly hurts her and worse, it tempts her to believe the lie that she's not worthy. But later when speaking with Kit, she says, “Never mind what they call me” showing us she has not embraced the name meant to strip her of dignity.

Whether good or bad, she is thankful for what comes her way. Gratitude enables her to find joy in all things. Notice she says thank you to the godmother, thanking her for her part in this fairy tale. She thanks even the mice for their help. 

At the Ball, notice she goes with the flow and is pleased however it goes. She has no expectations and does not grasp, she just makes room and responds to what happens. What a surrendered life!

We women need to prayerfully surrender our wills like Mary and submit to what is given, "May it be done unto me according to thy word."

The Fallen Woman

While Ella beautifully illustrates the feminine genius, we also have a model of the fallen woman: the Stepmother. She consistently illustrates the ugliness that comes with selfishness. She is the opposite of Ella in many ways. 

I wanted to point out how the stepmother illustrates the opposite of the feminine genius. She gives us an example of what not to do.

While Ella has seen grief, she does not let it destroy her or make her bitter. But the stepmother’s grief permits her to be evil and treat others poorly. As the narrator put it, “She too has worn grief but wore it wonderfully well.” She was hurt and let the hurt make her bitter

While Ella shows us that love can multiply and willingly shares her father’s love, the stepmother is jealous of Ella and how much he loves her. 

While Ella includes others, even the least (the mice), the stepmother is exclusive saying, “You can’t sit at our table” to Ella. 

While Ella compliments others and builds them up, the stepmother continues to insult and tears down and makes them feel bad. For example, she tells Ella that she is a servant, “That is what you are, and that is what you’ll always be.” taking a truth and twisting it into a demeaning lie.

While Ella receives what comes her way and responds with grace, the stepmother tries to control and gets angry when it doesn’t go her way at the ball. She grasps, connives, and schemes, to get her way. 

Ready to Watch the Movie

Say this or something similar to your kiddos:

“Today I want to show you all a truly beautiful movie. It’s called Cinderella and I want you to pay attention to how and why Ella, the main character, is beautiful. Not only does she look pretty, but she acts beautiful too. 

Throughout the movie, Ella knows her father loves her. She is kind, brave, forgiving, she serves with a happy heart and she includes others. Her Stepmother is the opposite, she is jealous, mean, she’s unfair, selfish, and makes others feel bad about themselves. 

My daughters, I want you to think about what kind of woman you want to be. Do you want to act like Ella or like the step mother? My sons, do you want to hang out with women like Ella or like the step mother?

Then watch the movie.

Questions for after the movie:

What did you think of the movie?

Did you notice the kindness of Ella? What was your favorite thing Ella did?

Did you notice how mean the step mother was?

Girls, let’s ask for Mary’s help for the strength to be like Mary, to be like Ella: Kind, brave, loving, selfless and receive what God has in store for us with gratitude. Boys, let's pray for the women in our lives to be like Mary.

Hail Mary, Full of grace… Amen.

To learn more about Catholic perspectives on the Call of Femininity, check out our Home and Parish versions of the Full of Grace Workshop!